Carbon Tax

My fave tax is one on carbon dioxide. Why, because every time I exhale I have to pay. Of course, this is why it is such a great tax. Politician in favor of carbon tax, please stop breathing - now.

2010?

Always wonder what the world will look like in the future. That movie 2012 was a documentary.

word up

Word up dudes, it seems micro soft can no longer sell word. Yes a judge rules in court microsoft cannot sell word. Of course, we need to destroy one of the few companies we still have. Silly me...

Skeptics say that everything is fine, we are in a recovery.

you cruise you lose

Giant cruise ships are getting to big to dock. It's not just oasis of the seas. In other news, passengers on airplanes are so fat the planes cannot get off the ground. :)

other planets

There are thousands of planets similar in size to our own. They move in Earth-like orbits around sun-like stars and are more friendly than mars. I wish ozama would move. Hmmm, yes to a planet far far away.

Green Shoots

Wonderful wizard of ozama keeps talking about green shoots. Well, I think they are going to wither away. Expect it any day now.

Tiger

Tiger has some advice for ozama. "Don't g-get c-c-caugtttt!"

Alternate History

What if all our ancient history is a forgery. The old empires, such as rome never were - иo way you say. Well, there is a man with such a theory right now. Such is the thoery of eиo Fomenko.

What europeans are saying

Listen to what is taking place across our ocean.

How now bow now

Bow down to your masters - osama.

oasis in ocean

If you travel to port everglades, a place near miami, you can see oasis of sea, the biggest ship in the world. This floating city can carry 5,400 passengers. It is state of the art luxury with inside malls, gardens, and 2,000 crew.

This reminds me of the brazil movie. In the future people would go on luxury cruises.

retrofuture

The future such an exciting place. Here is an old B&W retrofuture Doctor Who episode. That wonderful time travel saga. Much more exciting than Steven Gibbs Time Machine. Perhaps we could tell a person in 2001 what the future was like, I mean the towers and all. They would laugh out loud when you told them the prez's name.

Dollar death

Central banks are shifting away from the dollar. Please do not worry. Everything is fine, Ben says so.

Klingone in is real

Well, your eyes can deceive you, but I saw this headline on cnn.

Clinton rties to jump-start Mideast talks

What is "rties" as in what does it mean?

GMAC daddy

I could not say it better myself.

clock

Hey guys dontcha juss luv working on the clock? That eagle eye boss man. He can see that you take too long to do your job...

nuclear iran soon

They say it is time to accept a nuclear iran. Well, ALMOND-DINE-JIHAD, the prez of i ran away is saying he wants to wipe the state of is real of the map. It does not take a genius to see what is coming. I don't need Steven Gibbs time machine to tell you our future is very grim.

Freedom Tower

People, our Freedom Tower is rising.

death of dollar

I blame ovampire - no excuses. Try this on for some size. Print lost of little green pieces of paper. Get all your fiends to pretend they are real money. Print some more.

H1N1 virus in pigs

Believe or not science is amazing. For example, today a news report of H1N1 virus found in pigs. This is amazing. I mean swine flu found in swine.

Fox less bias than CNN

Folks, this may be a bit of a surprise. It seems that Fox is less bias than CNN, also a lot less than MSNBC. Fair and balance, is more than a saying.

Camel beauty dies after falling down oil well

Court awarded $250,000 to owner of a camel beauty that fell down an oil well. Well, take a look at her picture. Saudi aramco paid out the quarter million dollars to the saddened owner. She won a camel beauty contest. OK, so far no word from osama about his feelings about the tragic loss.

Time Machine on EBAY

Step right up nice folks, there is an auction on EBAY. It is for a time machine. OK now if we can go forward, we could back we can see how to stop our present problems, by warning people not to believe the hype master. Here it is -
radionic on ebay.

osama wins prize

Chavez sez osama dont deserve noble prize. I disagree, he did stop the war in iran, iraq, afgagninstan, etc.

Hey even jews and arabs get along now - RIGHT!

North Korea drops communism

North Korea drops communism. OK, yep it sounds like a joke, but its true. The north is now a militaristic dictatorship, or a monarchy. Where are we going to be in a few years?

Nutty Squirrels

OK you have heard the saying - nutty as a squirrel dropping. I believe a diet of walnuts will make you well, a bit - nutty.

What a difference 50 years make

Back in 1959 many americans were worry on russian. It was a time of Sputnik. There were 50,000 drive in movies. Well, now there are less than 400 left and many drive in movies will fade to black. Few people are happy now. Things have changes, yes our american empire is near communism.

wax museum

There should be a hot day at the wax museum. OK my favorite is the statute of wacho jacko, it look like a freak. Then again osama is also there. Few can hold a candle to that one, but he looks melted. He needs a bit of work.

Teens who got acne often feel alienated from their peers. I know a girl in high school that was kicked off the cheer leading squad because she had acne. The pressure to perform is just beyond belief and then poof you are gone. That is why you should remember that all those jokes like pizza face hurt.

In fact, osama wants to ban the term - pizza. As hate speech.

Unemployment at 26 year high

Hey, there is no recovery. Jobless rate is still going up. Foreclosures are going up.

ozzie

How is our recovery coming on ozzie? Well, many more workers than anticipated filed unemployment benefit claims this week. Oh yes we are still going down...

micro sow going up

BINgo! It gained 1% share of search engines. Caution, falling rocks, I mean stocks!

Poem

I have fallen in love with a girl with golden fair
she is so beautiful that magic is in the air
her eyes are blue, her skin is fair.
Agnetha Fältskog

osamacare makes me sick

Are you sick of all this HELLth care talk? I am...

Hey, osamacare is making us all sick with worry.

run like the weird

Potential girlfriend for Hitlery. "Tests reveal that Caster Semenya's testosterone level is 3X that of a normal female." I'm laughing so hard I can fall down. Dude, this runner is a man!

cash for clunkers

Today is the last day for cash for clunkers. Sad to say, but many clunkers are still on the road. Others are slowly rusting away like our economy.

osamacare

Hey folks, osamacare can be bad for your health, yes and wealth too. OK so go to your doctor, the one with the funny accent that use to work inside a 7-11 serving a super slurpee. He voted for osama and loves osamacare. I have a new word for you peeps, it is camzarian. Learn it, and live it - as in life is so camzarian.

oz is boz

Hey bro, osama is spending your money like a drunken sailor on shore leave, cuz our boy oz is printing money green like Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe. Well take a look at zim, once breadbasket of africa, now look what happens to that lil country, complete hyperinflation.

analysis

ANALysis means breaking down a complex topic into it simpler component parts. For example if I tell you that Clark Kent is actually superman wearing a pair of glasses. Well, check out the picture, or that osama is a muslim.

Let's have a beer

Ok so congress wants some say on Wall Street pay. You mean we cant just all get along. I mean billions for banksters, but not a penny for the poor?

racism is alive

Despite news to the contrary, racism is alive and well. Hispanic keep out sign is similar to whites only signs in the 50's.

Hitlery says US will accept nuclear iran

Step right up folks, PT Barnum here. US will accept nuclear arm iran says Hitlery. This news is really something. I feel that we are finally hearing the truth - from Hitlery, no less.

parallel universe, grandfather paradox, & time travel

Michio Kaku explains the grandfather paradox, parallel universes, and time travel. It is a lot of fun. Perhaps on a parallel universe, Hitlery is pres - shudder...

heaven/hell

OK in heaven you have a Japanese wife, your cook is Chinese, reside in a British summer home and live on an American executive salary, but in Hell, however, you have a a British cook, live on a Chinese salary, in a tiny Japanese house, with your typical American wife - as in Hitlery.

politicians are liars, dont listen to them

WAKE UP! Right now our economy and financial systems are on life support, they will start flat lining soon.

Peter Schiff was called pessimistic, but he was right on the money.

ocean sprawl

Add a new word to your lexicon - ocean sprawl. This is what happen when there is too much traffic on our seas. Perhaps we can time travel back to the 1500's and sailing ships. Look on the bright side, no greenhouse gases from sailing ships except from the fearless crew.

Time Travel (humor)

With a time machine we could stop Hitler and Hitlery. By doing time travel to the past. All we need is Steven Gibbs time maCHINE!

WWIII

Kim says he can hit us any time he wants to. OK, guess what, he might not be bluffing.

Addams Family Robot

Here is the Addams Family Robot. Hitlery should audition for the part of WITCH!

California out of money

OK my solution is to use orangeback ten monopoly money. Hey, we can pay people with play money.

winner winner, no chicken dinner

KFC ran out of free chicken dinners after Ophra offered them on her show. I get people can't get enough of the bird. This is no cock and bull story either. KFC ran out of free chickens.

Steve Jobs Liver

I think he needs a new heart not a liver, that said the apple exec got a new liver. In other news osama got a brain transplant. Not sure who the donor is.

Stop the slaughter

Folks, every single year, billions of innocent harmless plankton are ate up by evil vicious angry whales. Hey, we just gotta do something to stop the slaughter - or one day soon we wake up to face a planet without plankton - imagine.

Well, my solution is - nuke the whales! (JOKE)

young osama

That boy ain't a never crack no smile.

7-11

I love 7-11. It is a very very grrr8 store. People like my super slurpeeeee! Taking my bike to 7-11 is a max joy, and one day we will all live inside 7-11.

Religion in politics

A used car sales man once told me that if I thought they were bad, priests were worse. He said - they sell the intangible. It is like they take money and they claim that you can trust them with your eternity. In some ways politicians are similar. Except you go to jail if you refuse to pay.

dog fo' osama

Yo dawg, I hear osama needs a dog. Well, here is a pooch 4 r man.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

2012 is coming?

This is my guy Celente. He is telling it like it is.

Astral Hell

Perhaps this world is not real, and I was sent to astral hell. I mean how could things be so bad? Except if this is the infernal lower levels of astral hell. This has gotta be a f-frightmare or something. Please wake me up!

eurozone rise

Hellary does not see that as an american empire implodes a eurozone empire rises. It is going to be obvious as time goes by. Check out freefoto.com

Time is running out

Time is running out for osama, and you do not need Steven Gibbs Time Machine to see that things are going to get worse.

Will we ever see our money we loan GM?

It is my belief that we were pouring money down a rat hole, by loaning GM billions. O-man says give GM more money!

Bailout Nation?

Fleetwood Enterprises the nations third largest maker of RVs is going bankrupt. Hey, they did not get a bailout like GM & Chrysler, so how about a helping hand? There are many more about to go under. The list goes on and on.

sonia

A loud mouth latina wants to be supreme. Get this, she is a racist. I'm McLovin it, some say it is a mayor mistake.

Deep buget cuts in California

California leaders get ready for deep budget cuts. Therefore, what we will have is more taxes and less services. It sound like a great election platform. I will raise your taxes and cut your services.

no hummers?

Prez has a new plan, for all cars to get over 35mpg. Hey, maybe we can all get a bicycle - the zero fuel option. I guess when the White House proposes new stricter fuel standards and winter hits, we can take the bus.

GULP!

no TARP 4 U

Tis true, only the few, the proud, the banksters get a TRAP, I mean a TARP. Meanwhile we get caught in the rain. These days it is raining dollars.

Hitlery

Hitlery should not be in the Middle East because she is not going to help things. :)

unemployment is near 9%

✔OK you got a job? Good, try to keep it. Finding a job now got a lot harder. True, even a $7/hr burger flipping job is hard to find. I tell you our economic recovery is a joke.

so long freedom

Step right up folks and get your free bottle of ism.

can't jumpstart a dead horse

Desperate attempts by osama to jump start GM are a failure. Hey, you cannot jumpstart DEAD-troit or St. Lose. Get real, if GM was making small cars that are gr8, not the Korean Krap Kar aveo, we would not be in this mess.

GM wants to make big SUV monsters like our iconic Hummer. Well, even osama with his magic wand cannot bring DEAD-troit back to life, and that's the truth.

osamaHOOD - rob the poor to feed the rich

Here is Saints Tail an anime about a master thief.

osama takes the wheel

Hey, whose driving this bus? Well, osama has taken the wheel, so buckle up. It's gonna be a bumpy ride!

secret is 88mph

OK, imagine if you could see the future. You could have told Marty McFly that he would turn into sir shake a lot. You could have told superman from "somewhere in time" that he would spend his life in a wheelchair. And you could have told bush that the next prez would be osama.

Al Franken-stein

There is a new braille silver dollar coin so people in congress can see money. Heck, even Al Franken-stein can read this one.

lack of experience = EPIC FAIL

Here is what happens when our prez tries to fix things. A man with no experience who give billions to banksters and now our economic crisis is worse.

see a microscope

Need to find the brain of one osama? Well, get yourself a microscope. This guy likes to make fun of retards in the very special olympics. He would fit right in.

oBUSHa

Papa Bush and the cleaning lady had a son. His name is oBUSHa. This other brother of "W" says he will "CLEAN UP" our country. Sadly, there is an incompetent running our country who cannot run the corner coffee shop.

Gordon Geckko CEO

The fat cat bankers could use a little reality. The blew your money and want more. You want to give them some more osam a?

execs luv ossie

Please, can I get some bailout money too? I want a Lear Jet, and a blonde secretary. The execs really do have a suite life. All that money, even when their company is going under.

When people find out the gov gave their hard earn money to a few fat cat execs, you could have trouble like for example, John Titor's Civil war.

reinvent the wheel

OK, osama says proper inflation is the key, but here is a tire that does not need air. It can be use on moon machines, or even here on earth.

weesa gonna recova

If you believe that I have some nice sunny Florida swamp land you might want to buy. Wait a minute I sold it. Sadly, your man osama is selling you a recipe for disaster with a big D. Get ready to exit all markets. Take the money an run!

survive

HDR Caduceus Coil Making an HDR Caduceus Coil. How does the Caduceus Coil do its magic? Astral Time Travel using HDR How to use an HDR for astral time travel. Astral Time Travel. A Hyper Dimensional Resonator or HDR built by Steven Gibbs is my fave gadget. FluxCap.com News - Flux Cap by John Bajak Latest news on Flux Cap & other gadgets.

Aign't gonna happen?

"AIG has received more than $150 billion in federal aid since its brush with bankruptcy last fall." says CNN
http://money.cnn.com/2009/03/05/news/fed.transparency.fortune/index.htm

They are begging for more money. Should we bail 'em out and let execs fly their lear jets? Please, osama, I think we gave them nuff already.....

Weekend at Bernie Madoffs

Hey, one of my favorite movies is "Weekend at Bernies" about a crook that has enemies. Its a real party. This movie is so funny.

see Weekend at Bernies video

Hitlery

Here is my opinion of Hitlery.

Blackberry is hot -- too hot

Smoldering backberry bolds are causing heated controversy. This PDA is so hot, it is literally on fire. The overheating devices pose a danger to the public, and osama should get rid of his.

Future of america?

Let me tell that Stanford will probably get off. Nancy Pelosi got a hug from him.

recovery act

weesa gonna rebill, weesa gonna recova - if you believe that, you should smell a fart. According to congress, it smells wonderful, like a bouquet of roses.

Truth is, it smells sulfurous, like a rotten egg.

Don't drink the Kool-Aid®!

Ghost Malls are coming soon

Sadly, the stimulus package was an EPIC FAIL, so we are seeing a new creature - the Ghost Mall. Yes, they are popping up every where. It is like those empty industrial parks that are shells of their former selves. Ghost malls are like those boom town in the wild west. When the gold ran out, they turn into ghost towns.


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recession crime wave

When all those people without jobs start to get angry - WATCH OUT! OK, can you spell D-sass-ter. I see a recession crime wave in your future. It is true, times have changed, but not for the better as you can see. Future crime will be a lot worse than now.

Please buy bonds

Hitlery was in China saying "Please buy our bonds." The people need to see that nothing has changed. Still waiting for the ex director of Wall mart to explain why everything in the store says - made in China...

Hitlery in china

Prime Sinister Hitlery was in china today. She flew there using her broom. She wanted to save fuel. The evil wicked witch of the west is here, said Premerie Hung Chow.

Ghost Town Mall

Do you hear an echo. The mall is like a ghost town, spooky empty place.

Hitlery's Headaches

Here are there major headaches that mean she is probably happy to not be the prez.

Detroit is Bankrupt
Housing Crisis
Bank Nationalization

She would have been remembered as the bad Klingon I mean Clintgon.

porn tax

NY gov David Paterson supports a 4% tax on digital downloads. They call it the porn tax. Well, guess what - David Paterson is blind! Yeah, he can't look at girly movies. You can't make this $#@+ up! A blind man wants to tax porn, its too funny. What is next, a deaf man wants to tax a CD players?

Where on earth is osama?

I believe he is no longer in a cave in pakistan, I believe he is in a house located at 1600 pennsylvania ave.

2009AD

Will the stimulus work? This is what 2009 looks like.

Tom Smith

When getting tech support and you ask "Who am I talking to? and an answer comes "Tooom Smeeeet" ask the little man on the line "Who is greg norman?" The answer will usually be something similar to a "He rock & roll star?" Well, you can now ask "Have you ever heard of the White Shark?".

Lincolns new penny.

I love the new penny. However we see an orangeback ten that looks like monopoly money. Wonder if there will be a million dollar bill in the future?

New penny honors Lincoln's 200th

A dog 4 osama

Tanner want a treat, the poop eating pooch is now an envirodog. He recycles his own food.

Big bankers in vegas

Here are your tax dollars at work. It seems that bank bailout billions wee use to pay for a conference in vegas. Makes sense as banks are like a casino.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Time Travel help osama?

Did a time travelling osama girl help barry become president? Yes, you hear it here first. Driving at 88mph, that's the secret. Osama girl is the reason.

Stimulus means inflation

So what to do? Buy gold bars. It could get worse, Hitlery is ready. The big stimulus package is trouble, here is comes!

Look on the bright side

Hey, lets look on the bright side, gas is cheap, and so are new cars.

Squatters

People are turning into squatters. They are not leaving. Banks are foreclosing.

Hard life of a farmer

John Titor said that life in 2036 was like life on a farm. Well, life on a farm is hard, and that is the reason that many young men left the towns to work in big cities. Here is another John Titor Prediction, that many people in the future will leave the city.

The Dastardly Daschle

Dash it all, Daschle dont pay taxes. This is the kind of man we need in the Whitehouse. Leona "Queen of mean" said that only little people pay taxes.

Wind turbines dangerous to UFOs

All right greenies, stop building wind turbines as it could possibly cause an intergalactic incident. Also, birds get struck by the rotating blades - stop the slaughter!

max is max

Max Keiser tells it like she be. And soon the dollar will not buy toilet paper. It sounds like we are going to be the Zimbabwe of the west. Zimbabwe use to be called Rhodesia and was the breadbasket of Africa, now people starve to death and they have hyperinflation.

SBUX sux

Seattle based coffeehouse colossus Starbucks got roasted with negative sales figures and a declining financial picture. Starbucks plans to cut 300 more stores. The coffee chain took another hit after new sales figures came out; in latest figures it will close a total of 977 stores.

“The pace of weakening in the business environment and the global economy has been accelerating,” said Howard Schultz CEO of Starbucks.

This fall in retail sector employment will make things even more difficult for displaced manufacturing workers that are now jobless, and as our economy implodes people will begin to realize that instead of a severe recession we have a deep depression. The Colossus of Rhodes fell, and SBUX will fall too.


Latte Liberals no longer feel comfortable being seen in a Starbucks, no more double-top, no-foam, non-fat lattes. It is no longer cool to drink a four dollar coffee while people starve. In other news, the Starbucks executive jet is up for sale.

Trouble in the vaults

The mini madoffs steal even more money. Not to worry, Rahmbo will save us. The new trillion dollar economic stimulus package will turn the economy around. What exactly is the recipe for the hope hoagie?

McJobs

McDonalds plans to open 1,000 new burger joints. The 99 cent McChicken is a big hit with the poor. It seems like many jobless joes are now eating those greasy burgers. They are not good for your health. Still thousands of McJobs will open for desperate people.

Hitlery needs to offer some more free health care as few workers at Golden Arches can afford it. They can barely afford the stale greasy burgers at half price.

Save the Penguins

Penquins will become extinct when ANTarctica melts. Hey, what can I say. Better than bailing out a bankster. I wonder what RAHMBO thinks.

Rahmbo & Blogo

There be a log of blogs about blogo. Gov Rod had words with Rahmbo. This is a great link. Almost as wonderful as Hitlery. Things are getting interesting.

I'm McLovin it

LOLCAT 4 sec of state

I can haz jobz, pleeeze?


more animals

Klingon Keyboard

For all you trekkies, a klingon keyboard is now available. I wish they move an arabic keyboard into the white house. You never know if oz man might want to use it.

Zimbabwe troops eat elephants

Well, now that's a meal they shall never forget. I hope they do not eat the republican. It turns out that Zimbabwe troops are eating elephants. Don't forget to pack your trunk!

Al Franken-stein

An' ware did good ol' Al Franken-stein get his money from, warren buffoon? We need need management experience - like Big Top Bello. This guy is just a SNL bozo that should replace Ronald McDonald handing out happy meals. I'm McLovin it!

Is the economy getting you down?

Alice in wonderland

There is a disease called "Alice in Wonderland Syndrome" and I believe that osama suffers from this illness. Those who live in the land of oz know that all is not as it seems. The mirror can distort the image.

You cant make this $#|+ up!

Strange Senators

Al Franken, Caroline Kennedy, and Ron Burris, what a strange group of senators. Coleman won, but the clown prince Franken-stein did a recount where suddenly he found votes to "win". Caroline is the daughter of JFK, so we are a monarchy after all....


Poor Ron, he thought he was a senator, but he don't got the connections up on the hill. Sorry ron, but you would not win an election. Time to step down. Rod & Ron, what a team!